On the other note, it seems that people under a wrong assumption that I don't have friends outside of my little housemates circle. Yes, it's true that I don't spend that much time with anyone else in the university except these guys that I live with but still I have lots of friends except these guys!
Here's what happened (pasted from MSN conversation):
| oh, lol, well you see according to Maria I'm wrong to think that since the guys hang out with me from time to time that they don't mind me n' stuff |
| really, they hang out with me because they feel sorry for me that nobody else will otherwise |
| you see, it so happens that EVERYONE has a problem with me but they still hang out with me out of their own kindness of heart |
| fuckkards :( |
| LOL |
| I know |
| at first I was REALLY upset... to hear that said into my face... |
| pfft... *mocking* "So do you get the hint NOW?" |
| I'm confused |
| well, basically she just said that I need to get the hint and leave them all alone |
| which is what I did starting today |
| wonder where all this came from... |
| although it is impressive how long they were able to keep it from you if it's true |
| which makes me wonder if it actually is |
| people are liars...but I doubt they're that good |
| and I doubt Jin was |
| but what appalled me the most of that they are so friendly because they PITY me! |
| even if the rest of them were |
| I was shocked because I really can't see Jin having a problem with me but continue being so nice to me and going out of his ways sometimes too |
| a bunch of very sad people if they need to pity someone to feel better about themselves though |
| thats the equivelant of dogs in psychologists' perspectives |
| lol |
| well, me and her started talking - she wants me to get laid :S |
| it's true - it's the lowest form of self-satisfaction |
| so we kinda wandered off to how I need friends and I need to get out more |
| borderline pathetic |
| lol |
| and then I'm like, well, i've got my friends |
| and she's like, not you don't (basically) |
| then she goes on to stuff between me and anton |
| what's with this obsession about getting laid??:S |
| and I'm like, hey, i 'aint appoligizing to that bitch |
| (I know! she's so horny she's trying to spread it all on me! :S) |
| and then she's like, why not, you're making it harder for everyone else! |
| I'm like, how? everyone didn't say A WORD about it to me (or anton, I'm sure) so everyone seems to be fine with that |
| she's like, no they're not, everyone, EVERYONE has a problem with you! |
| I was like, WHAT? :| |
| lies! everyone's fine... look, I talk to artem on random topics unrelated to school, and we're fine |
| she's like, no, I feel sorry for you so that's why I'm telling you that even though everyone's all nice to you, everything is not fine |
| I'm like, what do you mean? why'd they hang out with me still even though they have a problem with me and everything's not fine!? |
| she's like, 'cuz we feel bad, we're the only ones that you have here, we feel bad for leaving you out all the time and stuff |
| and yadda yadda yadda, so on and so forth... |
| so I had an enjoyable convo that evening and could fall asleep until like 6 am afterwareds... lol, thanks, maria |
| what you need is a friend |
| chocolate is your friend |
| chocolate doesn't care who you know or who you hang out with |
| he just wants you |
| go eat some chocolate |
So yeah. It was a pleasant weekend! Did I hear someone say "Backstabbing?", "Fake friendships?" Aw, but you are so right!
I do need to get out more. But not to find friends. No, to lose the "friends" I already have.
On the happier note, I got to talk to Tamara on Skype today. She was leaving to university shortly so we didn't really talk all that much, but it was still fun. I'm so glad I still have her and Rolands and Artem around me! Today he's like "I don't have a problem with you." LoL, I thought I'd jump and hug him right there on the spot! I didn't, I continued cooking, but it's really great to hear something like that after all the crap I hear.
Well, I've slept for 4 hours from 9pm-1am. And it's 3am now so I've only gained 2 extra hours of sleep. I better not let it go to less than that!
Over and out, minna!
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